Update – How my life has changed.

A brief update

Since May 2017 I have suffered chronic pain and illness, my story is here if you are new to my blog and would like to have a read.

My life was well documented through my blog then in November last year I completely stopped blogging. So here is an update into how my life has changed over the last 6 months.

To be perfectly honest, life has been such a struggle since then, I have struggled to mentally come to terms with my illness and disability. Although my physical health has actually slightly improved, which is great, since my last post I’ve also lost my job, I’ve had to get extra help with childcare as I was unable, my wife has dropped to 3 days at work to help out at home more, I’ve had doctors wash their hands of me telling me that I might have to “accept that I’ll never get better” and to this day I still don’t have any explanation as to why I’m so ill and in so much pain.

Family trip to the beach
Family trip to the beach

My life now

As I mentioned I’ve really struggled mentally to come to terms with everything that has happened and how my life has changed. I’ve had days where my mental health has been at an all time low and I’ve done some silly things to myself in a cry for help. I might shed more light on that in a separate post.

I’m now under the care of a lovely NHS doctor who has taken my case very seriously. He has explained what he thinks is happening and has referred me for numerous tests over the last few months. These tests have all came back “normal”, which is great, however, it doesn’t help me understand what or why this is happening.

My day to day life is so different right now. Some days I’m able to do lots whereas other days I’m not able to do anything. I’m so grateful for all the better days I’m having and we’ve even recently been able to go on our first family holiday and get family pictures done.

Me and my wife
Me and my wife

The next few months

Over the next few days and months I will have appointments with a dietician for the first time, plus the pain management team, a psychologists and my GI consultant for routine appointments.

I’m also hoping to try get my mental health under control. With this being all over the place on top of my illness I’m completely exhausted and usually fast asleep by 7pm.

Anyway that’s all from me just now, just wanted to update everyone who has been asking after me. I really appreciate all the messages and kind words from you all.


This real life Dad

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  1. theelephantmum

    August 27, 2018 at 9:11 am

    It’s all about how you perceive your experience. Chronic pain is one of the hardest things to accept, you are not alone. I appreciate you talk openly about your challenges. I’m glad to read your wife is so supportive and I’m sure, SURE, you and your family will find a balance in time. It’s all about that.
    And I also hope you’ll name your condition, because that would make things so much easier.
    I had one person close in my life with chronic pain who never was diagnosed. He struggled with this nameless thing for years. At some point he just gave up and finally accepted no one was able to name what he had and simply lived by these “new rules” and accepted his own limits. It’s not something that clicks in your head, it’s a process… but I can feel how open you are about your challenges and I think you are on the right path to find balance and serenity. Hugs

    1. Thisreallifedad

      August 27, 2018 at 9:24 am

      Thank you. I appreciate your kind words. I’ve really struggled mentally recently but I’m hoping that eases over time and dealing to accept my new normal.

  2. Lj

    August 27, 2018 at 8:17 pm

    It’s really brave of. you to share your journey, I’m so sorry it’s a really tough one! As hard as I’m sure it is, I’m really pleased to see you discuss your mental health, it’s so so important for men to be able to be a bit more open about this. You are so precious to your wife, children, family and friends, with everything you are going through it’s undoubtable that mental health would be affected. Sending your whole tribe all the love and strength in the world to get through the next coming months xxx

    1. Thisreallifedad

      August 27, 2018 at 7:22 pm

      Thank you so much for your lovely words. You made me smile. 😁

  3. nadinebynature

    August 27, 2018 at 9:55 pm

    Thank you for sharing your struggles – without those, none of us would be who we are. You have a beautiful wee family! I do hope they get to the bottom of your pain soon! As someone who suffers from anxiety and depression – I really do thank you for speaking out. So many aspects of mental health are hidden away. Have a lovely week x

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